An Open Letter to My Torturers in New Jersey, Terry A. Tuchin and Diana Lisa Riccioli.

May 22, 2009 at 10:40 A.M. I am unable to access my security system to run scans. This new attack precludes access to my system. Efforts are underway to deny me access to the Internet. I will try to find public computers to continue writing. If I am unable to continue writing on-line, I will struggle to find some other way of expressing my opinions while confronting New Jersey with the disgusting criminality sanctioned by the state's legal profession and judiciary. As of 2:21 P.M., I cannot update my security system. I will spend the rest of the day struggling to run new scans.

"The situations of many evil doers are paradoxically like those of people caught in moral dilemmas. That is, they FEEL to the participants as if they face ghastly choices where there will be deep grounds for remorse whatever they do. In fact, this is an illusion: there are courses of action open to them that they have no moral choice but to take. Consider a policeman in the old South Africa whose job requires him to torture prisoners. If he does not do it he will be out of a job, unable to support his family, and branded as a subversive ... He overcomes his resistance, in order as he sees it to survive in difficult times, and starts down the long road to getting actual satisfaction out of destroying others."

Adam Morton, On Evil (London: Routledge, 2004), p. 129.

Terry and Diana,

I have always wondered how people become torturers, especially after entering one of the healing professions. Is it the power that you are given over other persons that becomes addictive? Money? How much of it is an "ego trip" for you? If you tell us honestly, we may be able to learn from you. That is the important thing: "We can learn from you."

I remember Diana said: "My power is greater than his." But Terry said: "No, it's not!" I remember her insults and hatred. I remember her pleasure in that hatred. I remember Terry's self-importance, his self-satisfied air of superiority. He knows what's best for everyone. "The cavalry's coming ..." He loves to say that. Most of all, I remember their smiles. Those smiles are burned into my flesh.

I wonder how much education Diana really obtained. Was Diana ever licensed as a psychiatrist or psychologist in New Jersey, legally speaking? Terry spoke of filing reports with the "court," so I wonder: What court? New Jersey's Supreme Court? Where are those secret reports, Terry? Who gets to read them? OAE? AG? Maybe I will find them on the Internet. Are they with the videos and pictures of me that were taken secretly? Shouldn't I get to see them? Don't I have a right to that information? Why has it been kept from me? How many others are secretly tortured, Terry?

I bet that quite a few of N.J.'s torture victims are minority men and women. I am now officially and publicly requesting copies of all files, papers, recordings, videos and reports of all kinds prepared "secretly" by Tuchin and/or Riccioli, and/or any other so-called "therapist" or social scientist of which I am a subject or discussed, submitted to any governmental or other entity in New Jersey or elsewhere, including all photographs or recordings, any other form of memorialization of any proceedings or "sessions" of any kind, anywhere, to which I was subjected, whether knowingly or not, from 1988 to 2009 -- and beyond.

I fully expect a denial of this request, silence, or the claim by "ethics" officials that "no one knows from nothing." This highly public communication means there is no chance that the request will be "lost" or that people will claim that it was never made. I have made the same request in writing since 1998. In a position statement approved by the Board of Trustees of the American Psychiatric Association, it is made clear:

"The American Psychiatric Association [APA] supports the use of psychiatric knowledge, practice and institutions only for purposes consistent with ethical evaluation and treatment, research consultation, and education. Abuse and misuse of psychiatry occur when psychiatric knowledge, assessment or practice is used to further illegitimate organizational, social or political objectives." apa@psych.org (emphasis added!)

The APA does not say that it is permissible to torture and question people under hypnosis, secretly, for years and then to pretend that nothing happened. Therapeutic rape and theft are frowned upon. Experimentation without the consent of victims is not allowed. So is all secret interrogation, Terry. How much did you steal from my office, Diana? How was sex with that unconscious woman? Did you enjoy your "relationship" with Marilyn, Diana? Did you disclose that relationship at the time that it existed to the authorities? Conflict of interest? What right did you have to invade my life in 1988? What did the New Jersey Supreme Court know and when did they know it? What do you say, Stuart?

Each day that the cover-up continues and that my Constitutional rights are further violated is a renewal of nearly twenty years of torture. Mr. Rabner, at some level, even someone like you must be aware of the atroctities committed and covered-up by persons who can only be classified as "agents of the state of New Jersey." Your continuing indifference to this horror and the silence as well as lethargy of your tribunal constitute a betrayal of your solemn Constitutional responsibility and of all human decency.

"The evaluee must be informed of the purpose of the evaluation or service, and [of] any lack of confidentiality, as well as the reality that the psychiatrist may not know how the information will be used. The information may require repetition. The responsibility to provide clinically sound and scientifically based consultation is still the case." (Forgot?)

There is no such thing as a twenty-one year evaluation. Furthermore:

"Psychiatrists shall always be mindful of patients' RIGHTS. In their role of treating psychiatrist, they should resist and attempt to counteract forces interfering with patient-focused humane treatment. [Why didn't you listen to me, Terry?] A psychiatrist should not be a participant in a legally sanctioned execution. Psychiatrists shall not detain or incarcerate persons for political reasons, use medical knowledge for interrogation, persuasion or fortune, or provide unsubstantiated diagnoses for use against political DISSIDENTS, whistleblowers or others."

Kidnapping. Theft. Rape. Secrecy. Deliberate infliction of psychological and economic, personal and social harm. All of these things are rejected by your so-called colleagues, Terry. Who authorized your crimes? Peter Harvey? Deborah T. Poritz? Stuart Rabner? Anne Milgram? All of the above? How could you condone by your silence the actions of Diana that I called to your attention in the late nineties and earlier? That episode before my child's school, why? "Chivalry Film Productions"?

I wonder whether you have now decided which of you is more "powerful." Power has something to do with this for you, doesn't it? You both seem to like power a lot. I bet you both long for the chance to help out at Abu Ghraib or Guantanamo. Maybe you have. Terry and Diana, the dynamic duo. I hear that you both have some problems now. Don't worry. "I'll go to bat for you." "You've got me on your side," Terry said. "It's no big deal."

Well, it was and is a big deal. It is a big deal that will cause me -- and others -- paralyzing psychological pain and other devastating harm for life. It also damages the U.S. Constitution. That's a pretty big deal. You both operate in a state so tainted by corruption that the chances of anyone doing what the law requires are slim. You both will probably continue playing God for some time to come. Diana will delight in sexual games with helpless men and women. Did you enjoy sex with women, Diana, while they were helpless or vulnerable? Is that what you do to young female inmates, Diana, have sex with them while they are under hypnosis or otherwise manipulated? Do you steal from them also? Did you, Terry, have anything to do with the questioning of Assata Shakur? Mumia Abu-Jamal? No comment as to both?

Terry inflicts suffering on victims, in order to come to the "rescue," so as to play the hero, the big man. God complex? Of course, this is only in order to inflict more suffering on them, so as to play the hero again. Terry will "go to bat" for them. That is what he said that he would do for me. He would "go to bat" for me. "I'll go to bat for you," Terry said. "You've got me on your side." "Don't worry," Terry said, as he asked others to inform on me, as he took things (illegally) from my home, "the cavalry is coming." Terry has a license to commit crimes in New Jersey, like James Bond. I will never forget that smile on his face or his laughter. I wonder if he is smiling now.

Diana said that Terry is a "sadist." Terry said that Diana is "retarded." They're both right. This is an ideal partnership between torturer-therapists. Each tries to undermine the other. Your tax dollars are well spent on those two. Terry contributes to Republicans; Diana takes care of the Democrats; and everything is hunky-dory. I wonder what lies Terry and Diana come up with to scam insurance companies and the federal government for "fees"? I suspect that they kickback some of those fees to people appointing them to do their dirty work. Maybe this includes New Jersey's corrupt Supreme Court.

Who was paying you, Terry, and for what services to be performed "secretly"? Where are those videos, Terry and Diana? Terry probably started out with military intelligence or CIA, as he liked to hint (though I doubt it). Diana is probably involved in organized crime, which is so merged with politics in her state as to be inextricable from it. "I am a lesbian," Diana says, before taking advantage of her helpless victims. Her lesbianism will probably come as news to some of the people in her life. How's the "family-like" organization, Diana?

I suspect that the Feds have been on to Diana for a while. I doubt that either of your techniques are very effective in getting reliable information from victims. The torture has become its own reward by now. Both of you display a strong sadistic streak. Maybe anyone given power over others is always morally deformed in such horrifying ways. Anyway, I am deeply sorry for both of you. Have you thought about getting some therapy? Torturers tend to develop a number of psychological problems over time. No matter what happens to me, I do not envy either of you. The thought of what you, Terry and Diana, "do" disgusts me.

At some level, it must disgust each of you to contemplate what you have become. Even those who cover up for you probably don't think too highly of you by now. In fact, I am sure that they also don't like you very much. You both must know, by now, that this sort of horror cannot be swept under the rug forever, not even in New Jersey. Let's ask the powers that be, why? Payoffs? How about it, Stu? Do you "demur"? Anne Milgram? OAE? DRB? Does N.J. speak to me of "ethics"? http://www.judiciary.state.nj.us/supreme/images/justices.jpg

Any "errors" inserted yet? I wonder how many others like you two exist in this society? How much of this sort of thing goes on secretly all the time? Who gets selected for such secret tortures? Are you two available for political campaigns? How about weddings and Bar Mitzvahs? My nightmare began in 1988. How do you live with yourselves? What do you tell yourselves to make it O.K.? How does a Jew or anyone become Dr. Mengele? Money? How does a judge become Eichmann, Debbie?

"I would like to learn from you," Tery said. Irony? A more subtle torturer can get much better information from a victim with less effort than either of you will manage in a decade of heinous cruelty. It must be frustrating for you to torture someone and not get what you want, because you fail to understand the person at all. This is not your fault and you must not blame yourselves for it. Neither of you is very intelligent. Any moderately complex person -- including yourselves perhaps -- will be difficult for you to understand. No wonder you became torturers, rather than real therapists.

Real therapy -- you sure can use some now -- was never really possible for either of you. Neither one of you could ever be a "real" therapist. I suspect that Terry still likes to pretend that he is one. How are things in Ridgewood, Terry? Still claim to be a Jew? Paramus? Who is "Stacey"? I have things to say to you, Terry. Why would you question a person under hypnosis about the actions of others in the presence of adversaries or legal officials? How many persons were present during those sessions? Who said they could be present? I didn't. How many interrogation sessions in total were there, Terry? How many attorneys were present? What were their names? How many other defendants in New Jersey have been subjected to secret interrogation sessions while under hypnosis?

This difficulty in understanding your victims will only increase the more you torture them. Oscar Wilde said, "Some persons are but small thimbles that can hold only so much and no more." Terry and Diana are very small thimbles that will always hold only "so much and no more." You have found your vocations in life, Terry and Diana, because torture requires very little intelligence and no moral sensitivity or empathy whatsoever. You are both well qualified for your tasks. If there are "all-American torturers" (and I hope there will be none!), then the two of you must be among them.

It is reported in the journal articles that I have been reading that a person who is subjected to "injected" subliminal perception and induced stress over long periods of time, especially under hypnosis, will display all of the characteristics of collapse and lethargy -- affecting job performance and functioning -- for which the person can then be blamed and punished, thereby inducing more guilt; thus, further enhacing the effects of these tortures. When this is combined with Diana's attacks on self-esteem, the results will be deeply and permanently harmful.

Long term, these "psychological torture" techniques are highly damaging to victims. They should never be undertaken over a prolonged period of time. Yet we have known each other now for nearly twenty-one years. And you questioned me, at irregular intervals, for most of those years. I bet it was really interesting for you. "We learned from you." Is that right? "Let's just pretend that nothing happened" isn't going to work, Terry. Is a nation that does such things -- raping and interrogating victims who commit no crimes and then lying about it -- in a position to judge the human rights records of other countries? How long will the cover-up continue, Mr. Rabner?

I promise you that we will know each other for much longer than that. I expect to find you both soon. I hope to be waiting for you one day when you come home, standing before you with a large sign asking questions of you. Direct but peaceful confrontation is next. I will be writing about you and posting my messages on the Internet. I am hoping to have pictures soon. I will publish books about my experiences. I hope to discuss these experiences with others who have suffered through similar encounters.

Many others, from many places in the world, have experienced similar horrors at the hands of State torturers. I was surprised to make this discovery. I am sure that each of you has other victims. Is it Diana or Terry who is responsible for the insertion of "errors" in these essays with the cooperation of officials in New Jersey? Both? You know that violating civil rights under color of law is a federal crime, right?

We will see each other again. This time things will be a little different. I will never do anything illegal. I will always do my best to be an ethical person. Mostly out of horror at becoming like you two. I will insist on justice (the real thing, not the kind that you "arrange" for others through your corrupt political or legal friends in New Jersey), but rather face-to-face with you, both of you. Think about that today. I will certainly be thinking of you. I make it a point to think about both of you, and your pal Alex, for part of each day. I set aside time to do that. A man who was tortured by psychologists and psychiatrists -- very much like the two of you -- in South Africa wrote these words:

"They [torturers and interrogators] are dangerous also because, despite the fact that they are conditioned to do their work and believe blindly that they are justified in doing it. [They say, like you did, "it's for your own good,"] and questioning authority or the validity of an order has never been part of [their] tradition, they are nevertheless very human with the same brittleness and the same doubts that you or I may have. The danger then comes from the internal doubts that torturers must struggle with. The dichotomy is between doing what they have been conditioned to do, unquestioningly, and the left-over annoying feelings of humane compassion [by now, this is only a problem for Terry, not Diana] and -- as they are not mentally or culturally equipped to resolve these contradictions or even to recognize them -- they tend to become very violent [and dismissive of criticism] in an unconscious effort to blot out and surpass the uneasiness of knowing that they are not therapists, but [mere torturers] ... and that what they do is not for the victim's good."

I will continue to fight against what you represent. I will continue to shout about what you have done. I will continue to speak of what I believe to be your many victims. Think of all of your victims as standing here, with me, confronting you with your loathsome actions, demanding an explanation and insisting on justice. Maybe you can still hurt me, but you will not silence me. Terry and Diana, you are two sickening examples of human greed, cruelty, and evil. You should be prevented from destroying the lives of others. I hope that you will be. I am not surprised that you hide from me. It won't be long now. I will never stop asking: Why? How could you? Do they pay you that much? Do you still "enjoy" torturing others, Diana?